Are You Tired Of Other People Making You Feel Guilty?

Here’s a wake up call. You are the only person who makes you feel guilty. Your thoughts create your emotions. We actually create the situations where others might badger us about things we’ve done or haven’t done.

When a situation arises and you have thoughts such as, I hope they’re not mad, I bet they are going to be angry, I failed…I didn’t get this and this done. When you have self-defeating thoughts or fears of another being disappointed in us, we actually create an energy that will manifest a negative outcome.

As Anthony Robbins would say…What you focus on will provide you more of your focus.

It’s important for you to have confidence in your decisions, to truly believe you are always doing the best that you can. Every decision you make, every action, inaction, every word that comes out of your mouth is perfect for who you and what you might be experiencing in the moment. Whether we don’t get the cleaning done, slept in, forgot to call someone, or even hurt someone’s feelings – it’s all perfect for that moment.

We all have opportunities for growth, absolutely – there are always things we need to work on, however, you never need to feel bad, guilty, fearful for what you have done/said, not done etc.. You were perfect for that moment and however it turns out you can learn from it.

If someone else decides to be angry with you because of you being YOU, that’s their problem. It’s their choice to be angry or it’s their button that has been pushed. If YOU choose to feel guilty or feel like you are in the wrong then you are simply putting fuel in the other persons distorted reality. The other person is in a distorted reality that is stemming from their ‘stuff’ so you don’t have to go there. To not go there you need to simply trust in you, love you for who you are and realize ‘yes’ you have opportunities to grow, but you do not deserve anyone chastising you. Stand up for yourself. Only speak to others about your opportunities for growth when they are in a balanced, compassionate state. If they aren’t there, you will not be receiving their ‘advice’ in an open manner. Even if they have valuable tools to help you to grow, if they are coming at you with anger, frustration, or a huge ego…they are wasting their breath and they are filling you with negative energy. Do not accept it.

Compassionately, tell them you would love to talk about it when you are both in a good place. Even set a date/time. Easy said then done right? The compassionate stuff can be difficult when we get our back up.

This takes practice. Practice saying, thank you for bringing that to my attention, let’s go into this more at _______time when I’ll be more open to receive your info. At that set time you might receive awesome info to help you to grow and/or you might be providing the other person great info to help them grow. You might be helping them to see their ‘stuff’. All of this must to be done when you are both in a compassionate and balanced place.

Note: every situation is different for everyone out there. You must above all trust your instinct in what is right for you in the moment.

If you lack the courage to be YOU, to believe in you, to communicate your truth…spend a weekend with me or 5 consecutive sessions. I have a 2-day Humour for Success course that is coming up : Feb. 28 and March 1 in Aurora. During this laughter-filled and incredibly inspirational weekend you’ll transform into the amazing confident person you were born to be. If you have the time to dedicate 2 hours per week for 5 weeks my Light’n UP Level 1 is taking place starting the week of January 12, taking place in Markham and Newmarket. You’ll get 5 weeks of transformation that you directly apply into your daily life every week for an intensive transition www.lightnup.ca – 1-888-LAF-LOTS. I also offer one-one one sessions – so whatever feels best for you.

It would be an honor to work with you. You must register NOW for the Level 1 as it starts next week – call me for details. If you register for the Humour for Success prior to Jan. 31 you can take advantage of the New Years Special $197+gst. After Jan. 31 the price goes back to $395+gst.

If you want to strengthen the communication and playfulness in your relationship – The Ultimate Intimacy Retreat is coming up May 2009 – you will want to register before the end of February to take advantage of the Early Bird Rate.

Remember to honor YOU!

May 2009 be a year of coming into your power, speaking your truth and fueling your JOY.

Written by: Jacquie Hermans – laugh@lightnup.ca